Note that individual results will vary. No results are guaranteed with the help of my advice, guidance, resources, training or any products and services I recommend or provide. All the products and services I provide are for educational and information purposes only. While my member testimonials of success are verifiable, this does not mean you will get the same results. It's no different from the gym. Not everyone who joins the gym is guaranteed six pack abs, it takes commitment, dedication and determination to succeed in any field. There are those who will not earn any money at all with my advice, guidance, resources, training or any products and services I recommend or provide, because individual results will depend on your determination, hard work, ability to follow directions and many more factors.
Note that individual results will vary. No results are guaranteed with the help of my advice, guidance, resources, training or any products and services I recommend or provide. All the products and services I provide are for educational and information purposes only. While my member testimonials of success are verifiable, this does not mean you will get the same results. It's no different from the gym. Not everyone who joins the gym is guaranteed six pack abs, it takes commitment, dedication and determination to succeed in any field. There are those who will not earn any money at all with my advice, guidance, resources, training or any products and services I recommend or provide, because individual results will depend on your determination, hard work, ability to follow directions and many more factors.
*This is my full disclaimer. Please be sure to read it carefully so you know exactly where you stand:
*This is my full disclaimer. Please be sure to read it carefully so you know exactly where you stand:
Sometimes just knowing HOW to overcome social anxiety on its own isn’t enough. That’s only treating the symptoms. But if we can understand WHY we feel social anxiety or shyness in the first place, we can reprogram ourselves at the source.
Curing social anxiety and developing social confidence begins when we realise that anxiety CANNOT exist when we’re fully present. Anxiety exists when we start projecting into imagined futures and experiencing them as if they’re happening.
And that future projection is based on the stories of our past. False beliefs, limiting beliefs, character traits that we’ve developed over time based on the stories we tell ourselves, traits that we now identify with.
This process of projecting into the future based on the stories of our past and replaying “worst case scenario” events again and again, causes a chemical response within our body.
Sometimes just knowing HOW to overcome social anxiety on its own isn’t enough. That’s only treating the symptoms. But if we can understand WHY we feel social anxiety or shyness in the first place, we can reprogram ourselves at the source.
Curing social anxiety and developing social confidence begins when we realise that anxiety CANNOT exist when we’re fully present. Anxiety exists when we start projecting into imagined futures and experiencing them as if they’re happening.
And that future projection is based on the stories of our past. False beliefs, limiting beliefs, character traits that we’ve developed over time based on the stories we tell ourselves, traits that we now identify with.
This process of projecting into the future based on the stories of our past and replaying “worst case scenario” events again and again, causes a chemical response within our body.
ANXIETY
ANXIETY
Our body and brain cannot tell the difference between a real scenario or an imagined scenario.
The mind wants to protect our character of “self” that we’ve constructed based on our past stories, and based on how we identify ourselves. And so when we imagine future paced scenario (Which our brain thinks is really happening), our internal programming is weighing up:
Our body and brain cannot tell the difference between a real scenario or an imagined scenario.
The mind wants to protect our character of “self” that we’ve constructed based on our past stories, and based on how we identify ourselves. And so when we imagine future paced scenario (Which our brain thinks is really happening), our internal programming is weighing up:
Let’s say we believe the following stories that we’ve created from our past:
“I’m shy and awkward, because of when I got bullied at school by the other kids in my class”
“I don’t like speaking up, because when I do people may judge me and think I’m an idiot”
“If I look like an idiot it means I’m worth less”
With that belief set, if we imagine walking up to a stranger, talking to them and getting completely rejected... It will not be in line with “who we think we are”, and our self-created stories are telling us that getting rejected means we’re worthless.
Naturally we don’t want to be worthless, because as human beings we have a need for significance and for love & connection. If we’re worthless, those needs aren’t getting fulfilled. So we’ll avoid risking getting rejected at all costs, which means we’ll feel a biological response that is designed to stop us putting ourselves in situations that will make us feel worthless…
The response, is the feeling of anxiety designed to keep us away from that situation.
Let’s say we believe the following stories that we’ve created from our past:
“I’m shy and awkward, because of when I got bullied at school by the other kids in my class”
“I don’t like speaking up, because when I do people may judge me and think I’m an idiot”
“If I look like an idiot it means I’m worth less”
With that belief set, if we imagine walking up to a stranger, talking to them and getting completely rejected... It will not be in line with “who we think we are”, and our self-created stories are telling us that getting rejected means we’re worthless.
Naturally we don’t want to be worthless, because as human beings we have a need for significance and for love & connection. If we’re worthless, those needs aren’t getting fulfilled. So we’ll avoid risking getting rejected at all costs, which means we’ll feel a biological response that is designed to stop us putting ourselves in situations that will make us feel worthless…
The response, is the feeling of anxiety designed to keep us away from that situation.
WANT MORE LIKE THIS?
WANT MORE LIKE THIS?
If you’ve found this useful and powerful, well there’s plenty more where that came from. Here are some other videos you might like:
If you’ve found this useful and powerful, well there’s plenty more where that came from. Here are some other videos you might like:
Disclaimer: Individual results will vary, I can't guarantee any results. Please read full disclaimer and privacy policy at the bottom of this page.
Disclaimer: Individual results will vary, I can't guarantee any results. Please read full disclaimer and privacy policy at the bottom of this page.
I'LL GIVE YOU AN EXAMPLE:
I'LL GIVE YOU AN EXAMPLE:
CONSIDER INSTEAD A PERSON WITH THE FOLLOWING STORIES
CONSIDER INSTEAD A PERSON WITH THE FOLLOWING STORIES
With that belief set, if that person imagined walking up to a stranger, talking to them and getting completely rejected... It WILL be in line with “who they think they are”, and their self-created stories are telling them that getting rejected means absolutely nothing at all. So there’s no “risk” at all, and no triggered feeling of anxiety.
With that belief set, if that person imagined walking up to a stranger, talking to them and getting completely rejected... It WILL be in line with “who they think they are”, and their self-created stories are telling them that getting rejected means absolutely nothing at all. So there’s no “risk” at all, and no triggered feeling of anxiety.
SO WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?
SO WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?
It means that the solution is to reprogram who we choose to identify as, and change the MEANING behind our stories.
We all have a past, we can’t change it.
But we can change what we choose to believe as the MEANING behind our past, and how we choose to RESPOND to it.
Is your past the reason that you’re miserable, or is it the reason that you’re happy? Is it the reason that you’re stuck in life, or is it the reason that you have perspective and unwavering motivation to move forwards? Is it the cause of your weakness, or the source of all your strength?
You get to choose, but you can only choose if you become AWARE of the subconscious stories that you’re running right now.
And the way to do that is to ask yourself this question:
It means that the solution is to reprogram who we choose to identify as, and change the MEANING behind our stories.
We all have a past, we can’t change it.
But we can change what we choose to believe as the MEANING behind our past, and how we choose to RESPOND to it.
Is your past the reason that you’re miserable, or is it the reason that you’re happy? Is it the reason that you’re stuck in life, or is it the reason that you have perspective and unwavering motivation to move forwards? Is it the cause of your weakness, or the source of all your strength?
You get to choose, but you can only choose if you become AWARE of the subconscious stories that you’re running right now.
And the way to do that is to ask yourself this question:
IS THIS THE TRUTH OR IS THIS A STORY?
IS THIS THE TRUTH OR IS THIS A STORY?
We have to listen to our inner dialogue and hear what it’s saying, then ask that question around everything we hear ourselves telling ourselves.
“I can’t because…”
“That means…"
“That’s impossible because...”
“If I do that then…”
What we’ll realise is that NOTHING in our inner dialogue is truth, EVERYTHING is a STORY. Because it’s all about our PERSPECTIVE of what happened in our past.
And our perspective can be changed. The only TRUTH is the factual event(s) that happened. Any emotion, any meaning, any judgement of whether it’s “good or bad”, anything else associated with that event at all other than a “police report style summary of what physically happened”, is our STORY. And that can be changed, we have the power to choose.
And the way you change it, is ask yourself what belief or story you would like to have instead, then go and find proof in the world that backs up what you want to believe.
We will find evidence in the world that backs up what we already believe. That’s called cognitive bias. So when you find evidence that backs up the beliefs that you’d LIKE to have, those beliefs will become your TRUTH.
And when you change who you see yourself as and the meaning behind things that happen in the world, you’ll start feeling differently about situations in life. Social anxiety only exists because we’re not identifying as who we want to be, and we’re creating stories that attach false meanings to future imagined scenarios.
We have to listen to our inner dialogue and hear what it’s saying, then ask that question around everything we hear ourselves telling ourselves.
“I can’t because…”
“That means…"
“That’s impossible because...”
“If I do that then…”
What we’ll realise is that NOTHING in our inner dialogue is truth, EVERYTHING is a STORY. Because it’s all about our PERSPECTIVE of what happened in our past.
And our perspective can be changed. The only TRUTH is the factual event(s) that happened. Any emotion, any meaning, any judgement of whether it’s “good or bad”, anything else associated with that event at all other than a “police report style summary of what physically happened”, is our STORY. And that can be changed, we have the power to choose.
And the way you change it, is ask yourself what belief or story you would like to have instead, then go and find proof in the world that backs up what you want to believe.
We will find evidence in the world that backs up what we already believe. That’s called cognitive bias. So when you find evidence that backs up the beliefs that you’d LIKE to have, those beliefs will become your TRUTH.
And when you change who you see yourself as and the meaning behind things that happen in the world, you’ll start feeling differently about situations in life. Social anxiety only exists because we’re not identifying as who we want to be, and we’re creating stories that attach false meanings to future imagined scenarios.